How to break your momma's heart

Step 1. Grow the most adorable, fuzzy, soft, fine, sweet, feathery baby hair. Hair that smells like home and baby and pillow and Sanders. Hair that for so many months has tickled my nose and my cheek and my chin as I cuddle you in the nursery before bedtime.

Step 2. Engage in the most panicked, guttural, heart wrenching sobs while getting too many of your adorable, fuzzy, soft, fine, sweet, feathery baby hairs trimmed. Reach for your momma with all your strength and press hot tears out of the corners of your eyes.

Step 3. Look a whole year older when you are set back in the nursery rocker an hour later.

Today I am done. You can find me rocking what's left of the baby in our nursery. My momma heart cannot any more today.